Adoption has entered my life again. This is Hayden. He is a sweet 5 month old baby boy and the new son of my nephew, Jason and his wife, Shannon.
Hayden
Every time adoption comes “near me”, it stirs up one main feeling…Happiness. I was so happy to hear of Jason and Shannon’s addition to their house and lives. Domestic adoption, which I personally understand, is so much different than international, also which I personally understand. The days of closed adoptions are over…thank God. I would love to have some information on my birth family. Just a morsel would be fine. That’s when other feelings related to adoption come to the surface like, fear and anger. Fear comes from the story I tell myself, in my head that I may never find and/or know my birth parents and in a sense never know “where I came from”. The anger is more from my desire for it to be different. That back in the 60s someone thought it was a good idea not to let any information leak, because the adopting family and the baby want to feel as “normal as possible”…like the child came from the woman that is raising him/her is the best thing for them developmentally. WRONG!
Me - 1969
My anger today is not as great, since I know they are doing it right. Open to partially open adoptions are so much the way to go. My kids are going to feel and experience some of both, plus the issue of their genetics screaming GUATEMALA, but their reality is USA. The pictures below were taken when they were still at the orphanage in Guatemala, Eagles Nest. I know the “mamas” meant well as these were the July monthly
Kaia - July 2008 - Guatemala @ Eagles Nest
Mateo - July 2008 - Guatemala @ Eagles Nest
pictures that our agency sent us. My job today is not giving them plenty of American culture, they live here, it’s all around them. My challenge is helping to preserve their Guatemalan heritage that flows through their blood stream and is woven into their DNA strands. I don’t want them to forget where they came from and ultimately where they are going. They live the present and feel every moment of it. That’s what kids do. It’s me that forgets my babies are adopted sometimes. I “see” them though, and they know it, because I tell them and they vibe it. Love just does that. The blessings of adoption are so cool that via the same love a biological parent has, I too get to experience what it’s like to “see” a child, “feel” a child, and LOVE them like my life depended on it. And now Jason and Shannon get to experience the same thing.
Welcome Home Hayden…ready for some lovin’?
